=)

you know, 2006 was a whir. it's exactly like how progrock would be. a mishmash of god knows what. the angsty drum beats, the out-of-place flute and bongo sounds, the pseudo philosophical lyrics, the emo-in-denial vocalist and the abrupt endings that usually lead to the next track.

yeah it was a whir, alright. a bloody fast one at that. i can't say i've enjoyed being 18 that much because it was as mundane as mundane could be. i've still got some months to live it up before i turn 19. not that that's a bad age. but i reckon i'd have to go through some personality makeover before i reach the big two-oh.

yeah sure its a long way to go but hey. 2 years ago i was 16. i had wire-frame specs and i bit my nails all the time. i read animorphs alot and pretended to be fascinated by sandra brown. my hair was forever in a bun even after i rebonded it. i kept saying carpe diem was my motto when, really, i was bounded by the system and the only act of defiance i ever did was to wear ankle socks. oh, i loved westlife and dreamed of marrying brian.

and i went to church every saturdays and some sundays. i vaguely remember going there to study, too.

see, alot has happened in two years.

i abhor changes. you'd think i'd be used to it. heck, you'd think you'd be used to used to it, too. the reality is, we're all living for the past. really. i reckon i'm alive today to remember what i did yesterday. and that's probably why it takes me really long to move on. i guess that explains my outburst earlier. because, i admit. i was hurt. not that i was the only one but i don't care anymore. its been months. nothing's going to take up my attention any longer than half a year, i swear.

despite sleeping for many many hours, i feel drained.