exuberance on this unholy night

it was a blast, even when we lost a 2 hr game of taboo. sigh. team Insane suay lah thats why.

anyhoos, i'm waiting for gg & chris to send me the pics so i can put it up and show you how halloween can be celebrated during this festive season. can be done, can be done. of course, chris' parents were a bit bewildered at such a theme but its all in good fun! we even got to subject zh and gg to our make up experiments, i mean, expertise.

sigh. i love you guys, man. love, love, love. its only with you that i can be exuberant and ecstatic and excited and ex-everything and not be the post-secondary sarcastic, cynical little bitch that i am.

SIGH.

and i'm going to start '08 with nary a resolution. fuck resolutions. who cares? i won't keep it anyway. "i will exercise regularly" uh yeaaaaaaaaaaah. "i won't cuss" UH HUH. "i'll be punctual." HEH HEH HEH.

anyway, whooo! next year, i'll be twen-teen!

i feel old, like how a two-decade old person should feel.

i also feel drained. but its quite safe to say that i'm naive enough to think the world's still a mighty pretty place. i mean, i can still tune out ugly things and ignore them until they go away or bite me in the ass when i'm more prepared. or just ignore them again until they disappear from the face of this earth.

ok, maybe i will have a resolution after all. that is, to stop being apathetic and care. as in, really care. like, if you cry, i should feel your pain or blah blah blah sort of care. i think i used to be that way a long time a go but i can hardly remember how it feels like.

i don't want to say 'i don't give a fuck' anymore. and i don't wanna NOT give a fuck either. its sad. it makes me feel like an observing entity and not Life's participant.

but enough self-improvement musings and shit. i should get to bed now. tomorrow's gonna be a long day.